pAREnts important

So I have been going at this Student Ministry stuff since May of 2009.  Not too long… but I have learned a TON of stuff.

(That’s good right?  I learn stuff good…)

For some reason when I joined the Church I am currently at, my first “Up to bat” with Ministry, I thought parents were lame.

Sorry Mom…

I specifically remember one time a Dad approaching me and asking how he could get involved with the Ministry.  Now, this parent had a Student who was extremely sheltered and I noticed when the dad was around the Student was extremely protective of how he was acting, basically not opening up.  This indeed worried me because MY GOAL whenever we have a Ministry Event is to MAKE SURE that the STUDENTS are as comfortable as possible so that we can dig in and help them grow.  Because of my observations with this particular Student and the Parents I let them know that as much as I would have loved for them to help, my “Policy” is to not have parents involved in the weekly ministry nights.

“Policy”…

…Pfshhh

What I have realized in the past two years is how VITAL parents are to your Ministry. 

Youth Ministry should NOT be a circle where parents are not allowed in.

Having two circles; one for Parents and one for you and your ministry is COUNTERPRODUCTIVE.

It should not be two camps battling one another for sole ownership of a Student.

Why?  Lets look at it backwards a little bit.

First off your Ministry Night is probably 2 hours, maybe 1.5 hours one night a week.  On top of that you MAY see your student during your weekend services.  So we will add another hour for that.  Every once in a while you will have a special event or take this student out one on one (Obviously the amount of Students you work with will affect this amount of time you spend one on one).  So for argument sake we will say that you will have 2.5 hours consistently with this student in any given week.  Not to mention during this time you really do not get to KNOW that student on a PERSONAL LEVEL.  So we are talking about 2.5 hours, 150 Minutes of engagement.

NOW

There are 168 hours in a week or 10,080 Minutes.

(How many of you grabbed a calculator to make sure my math was right?) < Bonus Points if you used a Calculator Watch >

So the amount of time you spend/see that student is roughly, a little over 1% of the time in their week.  1.4% to be exact.  Do you know how much you can learn about who a person really is if you see them only 1.4% of their week?  How much you can impact their LIFE with 1.4% a week?

THIS is where the parents come into help YOU out.  Yes I said help YOU out.

You see, parents know more about their kids; who they are, what they like, who they like, what they believe, than you may ever know.  Not to mention that the parents typically will see their student the other 98.6% of their week.  When you and the Parents of a Student are working together to impact the Students life, the changes and progress are astronomically better than when it is you VS. the parent.

Why make your job harder than it already is?

Take it from me.  I realized that my job is much easier when I KNOW that the parent has my back.  And honestly, the parent is much more bold with talking with their student about God when they know that you have their back.  Its a team effort.

When God, You and the parents all work together to impact the life of a Student the puzzle gets much easier to put together.  Instead of having one person trying to put a puzzle together as complex as a Junior High Student, you have four.

I regret not using that parent when they wanted to step up and be a part of the Ministry.  Now obviously this needs to be a case by case scenario.  You need to have the discernment to know whether or not the presence of that parent will help or hurt the growth of the Student.  That is where prayer comes in.  But make sure you are not closed off to the idea of a parent helping you out once in a while.  Honestly, it is better that way.

Trust me, parents are important.  Get them on board.

Get them excited.  Talk to them.  Listen to them.

Put the Puzzle together… together.

~ by bradgust on February 21, 2011.